J

by Hot Dad

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Scott Daniels
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Scott Daniels I have the Holy Cassette and the Heavenly CD both sitting on my mantle and I've never felt more Blessed! In the name of the Hot Father, the Jesus and the Holy Moly, Amen! Favorite track: Crazy Tonight.
Stephen Shores
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Stephen Shores Love this album. So blissfully drunk! Favorite track: Crazy Tonight.
Scratch-O
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Scratch-O Hot Dad has an incredible talent for writing catchy pop music, and the funny lyrics are always a welcome addition! J is more of the same, in a good way. “Crazy Tonight” kinda reminds me of The Cure/Robert Smith. Favorite track: Crazy Tonight.
mcrmy119
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mcrmy119 Incredible faith music! Praise the Jesus!
quolsleeves
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quolsleeves Great album, worth every penny. Favorite track: The Prince of the Damned.
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  • Cassette + Digital Album

    The brand new Hot Dad record, J, on limited edition cassette! Super Ferro Normal-bias music grade tape. 13 blissfully holy tracks, joining together to form one sacred—and salacious—sermon. Artwork by Peter Bjorndal. Includes free holographic sticker. Orders placed after 6/26/19 will ship around 7/1/19.

    Includes unlimited streaming of J via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 5 days
    edition of 333 

      $10.50 USD or more 

     

  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price

     

  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    The brand new Hot Dad record, J, on unlimited edition compact disc! Shrink-wrapped! 13 blissfully holy tracks, joining together to form one sacred—and salacious—sermon. Artwork by Peter Bjorndal.

    Includes unlimited streaming of J via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 5 days

      $10 USD or more 

     

  • Full Digital Discography

    Get all 82 Hot Dad releases available on Bandcamp.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of J, Weed the Bong, The Chowder Man, The Game Zone, A Christmas Shortcut, Now That’s What I Call Hot Dad’s Music, My Tape, Teens and Their Damn Smartphones, and 74 more. , and , .

    Purchasable with gift card

      $3 USD or more

     

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credits

released June 23, 2019

All tracks written, performed, and mixed by Hot Dad (Erik Helwig)
Mastering by Andrew Maury
Additional Vocals on “Heavenly Body” by Anat Belasen
Bass on “Jesus Take Me There” and “Party on the Ark”, guitar on “When It’s Holy”, and whistling on “HBJ” by Corey Johnson


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about

Hot Dad Ann Arbor, Michigan

I make emotionally-charged weird music.

Check out my YouTube channel:
www.youtube.com/hotdad

Here's my Patreon:
www.patreon.com/hotdad

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Track Name: Crazy Tonight
My Jesus, I waited an eternity
Your sweetness brings me security
My Jesus, your musk smells heavenly
I want you, and I’m just getting started, baby

And I wanna be in love with your body tonight
And I wanna be in love with your passionate kisses
And I wanna be in love with your long brown hair
And I love you, baby, Jesus, and I wanna take you there

Jesus, holy man in my life
We’re gettin’ crazy tonight
x 4

My Jesus, I want you to hold me
Take off your crown of thorns and have some wine
My Jesus, you’re so damn adoring
When I’m with you, nothing is boring, baby

And I wanna be in love with your body tonight
And I wanna be in love with your passionate kisses
And I wanna be in love with your long brown hair
And I love you, baby, Jesus, and I wanna take you there

Jesus, holy man in my life
We’re gettin’ crazy tonight
x 4

I could end your crucifixion if you just would listen
Spend the long nights holding hands and kissin’
Tell the Roman soldiers that you’re on a love mission with me
I could end your crucifixion if you just would listen
Spend the long nights holding hands and kissin’
Tell the Roman soldiers that you’re on a love mission with me
With me

Jesus, holy man in my life
We’re gettin’ crazy tonight
x 6
Track Name: HBJ
Happy birthday, Jesus
You are so kissable
X 3
I wish I was takin’ you home tonight

Jesus, you look stunning
In that red dress tonight
Shakin’ your hips on the dance floor
You’re the man of my life

Dancin’ and wigglin’, have a good ol’ time
I wanna kiss you, baby, wanna make you mine
Jesus, baby, you’re comin’ home with me

Jesus, we’ll be kissin’
And dancin’ all night

Happy birthday, Jesus
You are so kissable
X 3
I wish I was takin’ you home tonight

Jesus, you’re so pretty
You’ve got moonlight in your eyes
Huggin’ and lovin’, gonna get up close
I wanna hold you, baby, tonight

You made this guy pick up his guitar and write a song of faith to you
Because Jesus, baby, you’re the prettiest man and, baby, I wanna kiss you

Jesus, we’ll be kissin’
And dancin’ all night

Happy birthday, Jesus
You are so kissable
X 3
I wish I was takin’ you home tonight
Track Name: Crack Open a Beer (With Jesus)
Crack open a beer with Jesus
Crack open a beer with Jesus

I’m just a man, who wants to have a drink with Jesus
I’m just a man who wants to have a beer with Christ
Something on tap, don’t pop no bottle cap with Jesus
We’ll get some snacks, the beer will complement them well

Chug, Christ, chug
Chug, Christ, chug
Put that beer down your throat
x 2

Jesus Christ, please don’t drink in excess tonight
x 2

Jesus, Jesus
We want you to drink, pl-please, Jesus
Jesus, Jesus
We want you to drink, pl-please, Jesus

Crack open a beer with Jesus
x 4

It’s Friday night and I am at the bar with Jesus
He died for sins so now we’ll drink an IPA
It’s Friday night, the bar is packed, and I’m with Jesus
The rapture is near, so now we’ll drink a belgian ale

Chug, Christ, chug
Chug, Christ, chug
Put that beer down your throat
x 2

Jesus Christ, if you’re gonna drink, take it easy tonight
x 2

Jesus, Jesus
We want you to drink, pl-please, Jesus
Jesus, Jesus
We want you to drink, pl-please, Jesus

Crack open a beer with Jesus
x 4
Track Name: Jesus, Take Me There
Jesus, take me down to the city of love
Jesus, take me down to the ocean of fire
Jesus, take me down to the disco of sin
Jesus, lift me up, baby, then take me higher

When you get me goin’, baby, it’s the way you move
Then you shake your hips and show me sexy attitude
All night we’ll keep on dancin’ to your holy groove
You make me lose my mind

Jesus, take me there
When the night gets hot, we’re never gonna stop
Jesus, take me there
He’s moving real nice, a dance floor Christ

Jesus, holy baby, I won’t put up a fight
As long as you keep dancin’ ‘til the end of the night
Whisper in my ear every holy desire
Every dirty thing ‘til my heart is on fire

When you get me goin’, baby, it’s the way you move
Then you shake your hips and show me sexy attitude
All night we’ll keep on dancin’ to your holy groove
You make me lose my mind

Jesus, take me there
When the night gets hot, we’re never gonna stop
Jesus, take me there
He’s moving real nice, a dance floor Christ
x 2

When you get me goin’, baby, it’s the way you move
Then you shake your hips and show me sexy attitude
All night we’ll keep on dancin’ to your holy groove
You make me lose my mind

Jesus, take me there
When the night gets hot, we’re never gonna stop
Jesus, take me there
He’s moving real nice, a dance floor Christ
x 2
Track Name: Jesus Man
Jesus is a man, and I think that I’m falling in love
Every time you hold my hand, it’s your holiness filling me up
Jesus is a man, and I think that I’m falling in love
You’re so tender and attentive like an angel made of muscles and blood

Jesus, you can call me when you need me, baby, it’ll be all right
Jesus, if you’re lonely, just say my name, I’ll be by your side

Jesus Man, I’ll do whatever I can for your love
Jesus Man, don’t let me go, baby, I need you so much

I spent 25 long years of my life in pursuit of pleasures of the flesh
The only thing I didn’t know was that they could be so holy

Jesus is my man, and I know that I’m falling in love
Holy lovers making plans, we could spend our lives living in love
Jesus is my man, I could never dream of giving him up
He takes my breath away, I’m not the same, no other lover could be enough

Jesus, you can call me when you need me, baby, it’ll be all right
Jesus, if you’re lonely, just say my name, I’ll be by your side
Whoa, Jesus, you can call me when you need me, baby, it’ll be all right
Jesus, if you’re lonely, just say my name, I’ll be by your side

Jesus Man, I’ll do whatever I can for your love
Jesus Man, don’t let me go, baby, I need you so much
Jesus Man, I’ll do whatever I can for your love
Jesus Man, don’t let me go, baby, I need you so much

You got me, Jesus
You got me goin’ now
You got me, Jesus, tonight
x 4

Jesus Man, I’ll do whatever I can for your love
Jesus Man, don’t let me go, baby, I need you so much (Jesus!)
Jesus Man, I’ll do whatever I can for your love
Jesus Man, don’t let me go, baby, I need you so much (Jesus!)

J-J-Je-Je-Je, J-J-Je-Je-Jesus
J-J-Je-Je-Je, J-J-Je-Je-Jesus
Track Name: Sexy Heaven Nights
When the daylight fades, I’ll meet you at the pearly gates
Heaven can’t wait for your holy, salacious games
Please don’t hesitate, I’ve been needin’ you, I can change
Hand in hand, heart to heart, my Jesus, shining star

Lost in a dream, your holy smile
What would it take to drive you wild?
You shake those hips, you do it right
Oh, holy Jesus, I need you tonight

I’m lovin’ you forever, baby, Jesus, you know it’s true
Couldn’t ever love another, and I mean it, my heart’s for you
Every night when I’m sleepin’, it’s the same thing, I dream of you
Been waitin’ my whole damn life for sexy heaven nights

How could I live without you?
Jesus, it’s all about you
Make love to you night and day
I don’t ever wanna stop

How could I live without you?
Jesus, it’s all about you
Make love to you night and day
I’ll never stop lovin’ you

I don’t wanna lose my Jesus tonight
I don’t wanna lose my Jesus tonight

Sweet dreams in the dark
Heavy breathin’, your beating heart
When you came into my life, I was needy, I was falling apart
Fruitless to resist your tenderness and your kiss
Hand in hand, heart to heart, my savior, holy star

Lost in a dream, your holy smile
What would it take to start your fire?
You shake those hips, you do it right
Oh, holy Jesus, I need you tonight

I’m lovin’ you forever, baby, Jesus, you know it’s true
Couldn’t ever love another, and I mean it, my heart’s for you
Every night when I’m sleepin’, it’s the same thing, I dream of you
Been waitin’ my whole damn life for sexy heaven nights

How could I live without you?
(Live without you)
Jesus, it’s all about you
(All about you)
Make love to you night and day
I don’t ever wanna stop

How could I live without you?
Jesus, it’s all about you
Make love to you night and day
I’ll never stop lovin’ you

Lost in a dream, your holy smile
What would it take to start your fire?
You shake those hips, you do it right
Oh, holy Jesus, I need you tonight

I’m lovin’ you forever, baby, Jesus, you know it’s true
Couldn’t ever love another, and I mean it, my heart’s for you
Every night when I’m sleepin’, it’s the same thing, I dream of you
Been waitin’ my whole damn life for sexy heaven nights
x 2

I don’t wanna lose my Jesus tonight
I don’t wanna lose my Jesus tonight
Track Name: Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy

Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy
Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy

Hol-Holy
Holy Lord
Hol-Holy
Holy Lord

Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy
(Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy)
Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy
(Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy)
Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy
(Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy)
Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy
(Holy, Holy, Holy, Holy)

Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy
(H-H-H, H-H-H, H-H-H, Holy)
Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy, Hol-Holy
(H-H-H, H-H-H, H-H-H, Holy)
Track Name: Heavenly Body
Jesus I want you
Jesus I need you
When you're touchin' my body
The feelin' is right

Jesus you're in me
Can't get you out of my head
The thoughts lead to dreamin'
About the nights in my bed

When the sweat starts drippin’ down, I can’t stop us now, I wanna take you there, Jesus
When your body starts touchin’ mine, our hearts beat in time, I wanna take you home, Jesus
Heavenly father, gonna make you scream, gonna scream my name, when I touch you, Jesus
Now my bed is the only place where I see your face, and I love you, Jesus

Jesus, show your heavenly body
To me
x 2

Jesus I saw you
From across the room
You were showin' your body
To bring me to you

Jesus we're kissin' now
Finally alone
So holy inside me
My savior of love

When the sweat starts drippin’ down, I can’t stop us now, I wanna take you there, Jesus
When your body starts touchin’ mine, our hearts beat in time, I wanna take you home, Jesus
Heavenly father, gonna make you scream, gonna scream my name, when I touch you, Jesus
Now my bed is the only place where I see your face, and I love you, Jesus

Jesus, show your heavenly body
To me
x 4

Jesus, I need you to be there for me, baby
There for me, baby
Jesus, I need you to be there for me, baby
There for me, baby
Jesus, I need to believe that you’re there for me, baby
There for me, baby
Jesus, I need to believe that you’re there for me, baby
There for me, baby

Jesus, show your heavenly body
To me
x 4
Track Name: Party on the Ark
There’s a party on the Ark, for beasts and men
And Noah’s on the dance floor, drinking his gin
Polar bears, and snakes in twos, waiting for you
Bon voyage, we ain’t stoppin’, this crowd’s like a zoo

Start taking designer drugs and you will see Jesus
Oh wait, he’s takin’ ‘em too, over by the apes and kangaroos
Start sharin’ eternal love with hundreds of creatures
This party, it won’t stop until the waters drop

Party on the Ark, you know it’s waitin’ for you
Party on the Ark, set sail with nothin’ to do
Party on the Ark, let loose and open your heart
Party on the Ark, you prayed for a good time, and you got it

There’s magic on the ark, a new kind of party
Creatures mating in the dark, new species are starting
Got enough beer for a year, and cocaine/ecstasy too
DJ Christ spinning records, you know what to do

Start taking designer drugs and you will see Jesus
Oh wait, he’s takin’ ‘em too, over by the apes and kangaroos
Start sharin’ eternal love with hundreds of creatures
This party, it won’t stop until the waters drop

Party on the Ark, you know it’s waitin’ for you
Party on the Ark, set sail with nothin’ to do
Party on the Ark, let loose and open your heart
Party on the Ark, you prayed for a good time, and you got it

A million sexy beasts, all on one hard piece of wood
Touching, sweating, dancing
Living in a contained universe of darkness and sin while the non-believers burn and perish
Corpses littering the earth, rivers flowing red with blood, horrors beyond horrors
And I wonder, could this party possibly get any hotter?

Start taking designer drugs and you will see Jesus
Oh wait, he’s takin’ ‘em too, over by the apes and kangaroos
Start sharin’ eternal love with hundreds of creatures
This party, it won’t stop until the waters drop

Party on the Ark, you know it’s waitin’ for you
Party on the Ark, set sail with nothin’ to do
Party on the Ark, let loose and open your heart
Party on the Ark, you prayed for a good time, and you got it
Track Name: Kill Us, Jesus
Please kill us, Jesus, for hurtin’ you
Please end our lives for hurtin’ you, for hurtin’ you, Jesus
Nail us to the cross for killin’ you
Make us bleed all night for killin’ you, for killin’ you, Jesus

If you take our lives, it would be holy
If you kill our friends, it would be good
Kill our parents, our brothers and sisters, Jesus
We murdered you, so do us

J-J-J-J-Jesus died
And we’re gonna die next
J-J-J-J-Jesus died
And we’re gonna die next

Please kill us, Jesus, for hurtin’ you
Please end our lives for hurtin’ you, for hurtin’ you, Jesus
Nail us to the cross for killin’ you
Make us bleed all night for killin’ you, for killin’ you, Jesus

You could kill me in an accident, oh, Jesus
You could break my bones, crush my spine
You could cut my throat, dear Jesus
I would gurgle your holy name ‘til I die

J-J-J-J-Jesus died
And we’re gonna die next
J-J-J-J-Jesus died
And we’re gonna die next

Please kill us, Jesus, for hurtin’ you
Please end our lives for hurtin’ you, for hurtin’ you, Jesus
Nail us to the cross for killin’ you
Make us bleed all night for killin’ you, for killin’ you, Jesus
Track Name: When It's Holy
When it’s holy, you know it’s holy
When it’s holy, you know it’s holy
When it’s holy, you know it’s holy
When it’s holy, you know it’s holy

Holy
Holy
Holy
Holy

Holy
Track Name: The Prince of the Damned
Ooh, whoa-oa, Jesus
You are the Prince of the Damned
Ooh, whoa-oa, Jesus
The Holy King and my man
Ooh, whoa-oa

Oh, Jesus, I choose to believe
I’ve got the soft touch that you need
I’m certain you’re smitten with me
I’ve got a great personality
Oh, Jesus, we need to be
Holy lovers for eternity
Kissin’ and touchin’ so playfully
You’re on my mind almost constant

Oh, Jesus, hold my body when the feeling’s right
Oh, Jesus, we’re in my bed in the middle of the night

Ooh, whoa-oa, Jesus
You are the Prince of the Damned
Ooh, whoa-oa, Jesus
The Holy King and my man
Ooh, whoa-oa

I know, Jesus, your love ain’t free
I’ll buy you flowers, give you luxuries
10 carat diamonds, and nights on the beach
You taste like heaven, so tangy and sweet
We’ll swim with holy dolphins and visit holy seas
Sharing holy dinners, eating holy meats
Muscular, yet tender, burly yet serene
My sexy savior, the holiest belief

Oh, Jesus, hold my body when the feeling’s right, Lord
Oh, Jesus, we’re in my bed in the middle of the night
Oh, Jesus, gettin’ holy when the feeling’s right
Oh, Jesus, we’ll live forever, nothing can stop us now

Jesus, Jesus
x 8

Ooh, whoa-oa, Jesus
You are the Prince of the Damned
Ooh, whoa-oa, Jesus
The Holy King and my man
Ooh, whoa-oa
x 2

Ooh, whoa-oa, Jesus
Track Name: Christ's Boy (Bonus Track)
Would Christ’s son be free from sin?
How would he deal with the temptations of the world that his Father made?
Would his soul be pure? Would his actions be purer?
Or would he fall victim to the wages of sin?

Christ’s son is a little bit rough ‘round the edges
He ain’t the only one
I know it’d be a little bit tough having angels telling you to straighten up

Christ, please
Go easy on your son
Christ, please
Give your son a break, Jesus

What if Christ had a boy, would he be a good kid?
What if Christ had a son, would he play college football?
What if Christ’s son knocked up some girl in the bathroom of a bowling alley?
Would Christ punish his own son, or die for his sin?

This just in, Christ’s son did sin
He slept with the girl from the bar, took her home, put her in his bed
Shining down from heaven, Jesus watched the deed
He saw his boy inside of a woman, to fulfill his need

The bed rocks in the sea of sin
She cries out, “Please!”
Sweat-covered bodies, an unholy deed

Christ’s son is a little bit rough ‘round the edges
He ain’t the only one
I know it’d be a little bit tough having angels telling you to straighten up

Christ, please
Go easy on your son
Christ, please
Give your son a break, Jesus
x 2

What if Christ had a boy, would he be a good kid?
What if Christ had a son, would he play college football?
What if Christ’s son knocked up some girl in the bathroom of a bowling alley?
Would Christ punish his own son, or die for his sin?
x 2

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